November 08, 2003

Well, Look Who's Advertisin...

Well, Look Who's Advertising on Me Blog!: It's Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry. What's up JK?

To reward him for buying me off, let's all click on the ad, rummage around his site, and offer flippant critiques! I'll get the ball rolling.

* Bonus points for enabling comments on the blog. Because I am very mature, I think it's kinda neat that you can log onto a serious presidential candidate's official website, and see comments like "JOHN KERRY IS AN ASSHOLE. I WILL VOTE FOR BUSH BEFORE I VOTE FOR HIM," written by people named "BLAH."

* Don't much like the interventionist approach to the economy. Quote:

Kerry has proposed creating jobs through a new manufacturing jobs credit, by investing in new energy industries, restoring technology, and stopping layoffs in education.
Point by point: 1) We need less corporate welfare and subsidies, not more; 2) I'd rather the government not be "investing in new ... industries," and instead focus on providing essential services and non-market goods; 3) Lord knows how a president would go about "restoring technology," but it sounds creepy; 4) aren't the overwhelming number of education jobs on the state and local level, making any federally mandated stoppage of layoffs some kind of horrible overreach?

There's more on that page to quibble with:

John Kerry will save jobs by ending the unpatriotic practice of U.S. corporations moving offshore simply to avoid paying their fair share of our nation's tax burden. ... John Kerry will strongly enforce trade laws to assure that American industries are on a level playing field with our trading partners.

Course, I probably won't be voting in the Democratic primary, and my choice for 2004 will almost surely be based entirely on foreign policy concerns (though free trade, to me, is near the top of my foreign policy agenda). So if I have time, we'll discuss that next. But please, click on the site, and add your critiques in the comments! The only guidelines: anyone who uses the phrase "haughty, French-looking" will get a cream pie in the face.

Posted by at November 8, 2003 01:11 PM

That haughty, French-looking John Kerry ought to advertise on my site (only three thousand dollars a day, weekends free).

Hey, I love cream pie!

Posted by: Roger L. Simon at November 8, 2003 01:26 PM

But Matt! Haven't you heard? John Kerry served in Vietnam. Surely that will change your estimation of the man?

Posted by: Bill at November 8, 2003 02:18 PM

Look at you, already biting the hand that fe... Well, that give you extra burrito money.

Posted by: Crid at November 8, 2003 02:26 PM

John Kerry is not haughty, Matt. For shame.

Posted by: Bill Quick at November 8, 2003 03:16 PM

I dunno, I realize that Kerry plays up his military service (as does John McCain), but, you know, he actually served, unlike, oh, certain Administration officials you could probably name. I probably would have dodged that draft in a New York minute (I didn't register when I turned 18 in 1986), so I don't begrudge anyone who wiggled out of the war, but it strikes me at minimum as peculiar that certain supporters of the war-dodger-in-chief keep banging away at Kerry for talking up his military service.

Dubya talked up his *business* record, which was in fact almost uniformly lousy, despite him being given more of a head start than 99% of the population could possibly enjoy. Reagan, if memory serves, played up his patriotic war-support during WWII. JFK glamorized his PT 109 business. Dole weaved in references to that war injury in just about every stump speech I saw, and the much-loathed McGovern, as far as I'm aware, was one of the few who downplayed his military service, which was in fact quite extensive.

So, all things being equal, I'd rather give the actual war veteran a break on this one.

Posted by: Matt Welch at November 8, 2003 03:24 PM

Matt, you dated yourself up there. You're...em.....46 years old.

No, some tedious Viet Nam scold who tells you "I was there, man!" 600 times a week needs to be given no breaks. No breaks whatsoever.

Actually Kerry-Cohn, John Barleycone, whatever says "I was there, man!" and adds, "You are children, and I want to protect you because I was there, man!" Among the children he lectures to are special forces operatives and everybody else in uniform he calls 'boys and girls'. He needs to have the shit beat out of him by some of those boys and girls.

I'm not buying Ketchup until you remove that ad.

Posted by: ct at November 8, 2003 09:39 PM

ct -- Ketchup?

Posted by: Matt Welch at November 8, 2003 10:31 PM

hey, do you get paid on a click-through basis, Matt? Let us know, so we can maximize the income.

Posted by: Charlie at November 8, 2003 10:33 PM

Charlie -- No; I set the rates, and whoever agrees to 'em pays 'em. But if they get high click-thrus, then they'll probably be more inclined to purchase BlogAds in the future, whether on my site or someone else's.

Actually, you can see all the BlogAds ad rates here. Pretty interesting stuff, especially Sgt. Stryker's comment, and the fact that Atrios is so over-booked that he's jacked up his price to $3,000 a month (though that will surely go down once his contracts start coming up).

Posted by: Matt Welch at November 8, 2003 10:48 PM

Isn't Kerry's wife the heiress of a Ketchup fortune...?

Of course I should have said I wasn't buying any of something you sell until it's taken down. Reason subscription or something...

Ok it was stupid in many ways.

Posted by: ct at November 9, 2003 02:11 AM

ct- I liked it.

Matt did you ever register for the draft? If not, do you worry that it will be trouble for your medicare application someday or something? Makes no nevermind, I'm like you in terms of letting go with this stuff (I'm one of the golden babies [b. '59] who was never even asked to register). Just curious.

Posted by: Crid at November 9, 2003 09:22 AM

Crid -- No, I didn't register. They sent me a series of increasingly ominous-sounding letters, then let it go. I'm ineligible for student aid & probably some other stuff I'm not aware of, and I'm sure I'm basically on some Jerk-off List (combined with my illegal trip to Cuba, which they also got huffy about). Then there was that threatening letter from some angry wife of a guy who works at the DIA... But I'm not worried about anything, because my heart is as clean as a baby's mind.

ct -- Duh! Shows you how much I'm paying attention to Primary Season....

Posted by: Matt Welch at November 9, 2003 11:43 AM

Hey, I registered for the draft. Now you have to believe everything I say.

Posted by: Matt McIrvin at November 9, 2003 03:27 PM

I never registered for the draft, either.

Posted by: Paul at November 9, 2003 03:37 PM

Paul -- Looks like we have something in common! Oh, wait....

Posted by: Matt Welch at November 9, 2003 04:20 PM

Yeah, I found a loophole...

Posted by: Paul at November 9, 2003 05:52 PM

> JFK glamorized his PT 109 business.

I don't think that he had to do much - there were plenty of others working that angle for him, including a "major motion picture" (starring Cliff Robertson).

It was an extraordinary feat. How many other PT boats got run over by something less than half as fast with far less manuverability?


simply to avoid paying their fair share of our nation's tax burden.

This is silly. We all know that corporations don't pay taxes. No, no. I am not regurgitating that tired ol' knee-jerk liberal refrain i.e. 'all corps. cheat/avoid on taxes'.

They DO crank a fat check out once a year. But corporations, economically speaking, DON'T PAY TAXES. We, consumers, pay it for them via higher prices.

Why is this at all important? Cuz when shithead politicians blabber about raising corporate taxes, what they are really doing is increasing the tax incidence on the consumer.

In short, the corporate tax rate should be 0%. Consumer welfare would increase dramatically in the form of lower prices.

At the minimum, let's just be honest and rename the Corporate Tax Rate to "Additional *Invisible* Sales Tax on the Consumer".

Posted by: vlad at November 10, 2003 11:18 AM

I guess "haughty, french-looking" has a completely different connotation for me than other folks. When I hear that phrase, I think of a sultry chick with an indifferent, yet inviting look. Having witnessed the "haughty, french-look" firsthand while on a fact-finding mission to Nice, I can say that it's quite effective at driving certain men wild.

Which I guess is a bad thing if you're a dude trying to pull that off. Or maybe it's a new way to get votes.

"Man, I don't know what it is about that Kerry guy, but the way he looks just makes me wanna vote for him. God, I want him to be President in the worst way. Oh, you dirty bird!"

Posted by: Paul at November 10, 2003 12:04 PM

Haughty, French-looking:

Posted by: Crid at November 10, 2003 01:34 PM

I never registered for the draft either ...

End Trade Barriers!!!

No Corporate Welfare!!!

Posted by: Howard Owens at November 12, 2003 09:22 AM
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